Now You're Gone

Ugh I am so confused about what I should do! Joey's gone for two weeks and then I'm gone the week after. My best friend Tina is trying to hook me up with her boyfriends brother and yes, he is cute but I like Joey, actually I love Joey and have for a really long time. I wanna ask him to my cousins wedding with me but I'm not sure that he'll say yes and I dont want to be disappointed if he says no. I really hope he says yes though because that way I'll know that I can go with my plan that I have for this school year. Hopefully it'll even work...I'll just have to wait and see how everything turns out. I'm suppose to hang out with Tina, her boyfriend Larry and his brother Shawn next week though and I'm kinda not sure about it, but I said sure why not so I geuss I'm going to. Either way I hope I can figure things out before I go crazy. So I'm going to go get something to eat and just hang out for the day. Ciao.

She Would Change Everything

Seriously right now I dont even know what to think or do, things just are so weird between Dustin and I now, all because of the stupid shit I said. I guess I kind of deserve the awkwardness, I did bring this all on myself. He's sad, I'm sad, but he's the only one who could change it. Honestly if I could change this, I so would. I'd do it in a heart beat because then I wouldnt feel as lonely or bad as I do now. The lonliness is definently the emptiness I feel, he feels it too, he told me, but I'll get over it, I have to, I dont really have any other choice. I'm not quite sure how to even start 'getting over it', but I'll figure it out. Its one of those things that I have to do, theres no choice of 'maybe' there is 'have to'. I dont like to talk about what I'm going through, but maybe if my best friend were here things would be a bit easier. Then again, who knows.